Of course....nothing has changed in Port Browning in decades. Breakfast is still greasy, the bar is still run down, the local teenagers are still drinking down on the beach every night and then of course, there's Lou.
The Pt Browning marina is owned by a woman named Lou. Lou is the poster girl for bi-polar disorder, she's hired and fired almost everyone on the island - frequently on the same day. Currently, Lou tells us - she is embroiled with the liquor inspector and the local police over the latest party of local revellers mooning the president of London Drugs - who was dining at her bar. At the request of the local police (tired of being called to her establishment) - she has made a list of the usual suspects and by order of the police and the liquor inspector, she may not serve alcohol to the listees. In her telling, she is relieved to be relieved of responsibility and this may be the best thing that could have happened. It all seemed so serious until one local on the dock asked...."Have you made the list?" Lou can't resist waving the list at people she wants to lord her particular brand of power over and so - it has become, like so many other things "Lou" ...a bit of a joke. When I suggested to this local and his friends that for Halloween, they should all come to the bar dressed as......Lou - they all hissed and hushed at me - "Careful - she'll HEAR you!" So, while they all joke about it - she does own the only locals bar on the island.
Lou has been separated from her husband for over 25 years - she runs the business and he owns the 30 acres uphill that are the primary source of water for the business - he also gets to come do repairs but ONLY if those repairs are needed to quell some clear and present danger - this does NOT extend to the bathrooms or the showers which now resemble some third world archaeological dig. Our friend [deleted] contracted some flesh eating disease from the showers at the marina several years ago but alas - he's not suppose to be using them so he had to rely on Canada's health program for assistance there. Lou absolves herself of any responsibility for upgrading or even taking care of the place by keeping it up for sale - which it has been for as long as anyone can remember. She is rumored to have taken $150K in earnest money from someone who put the money up before they knew that the local conservancy group would be intimately involved in all of their future decisions - a point of interest she craftily offered up after the check was signed.
I was going to buy some serious bath and tile cleaner so that I could safely take a shower but eventually opted to just avoid the showers all together. I was hopeful when we met the new janitor who said that he'd spent 4 days getting the women's showers clean - until I learned that it was 4 hours - a year ago. The kind, hapless janitor doubles as the busboy for the restaurant and the bar. He dutifully empties the overflowing garbage cans then wipes the bathroom counters and the tops of the toilet seats, once a week.
It was our great fortune to arrive on the day that the kitchen had to be closed for a complete cleaning. Seems "an American" complained to the health board. Bless his heart. Fortunately - Lou doesn't hold a grudge - one day you're in, the next day you're out and if you can take the abuse for a return trip - she'll take your money another day. Unfortunately, there are many - most of the yacht clubs in Vancouver and Victoria for example - who will not take the abuse and so these days, the place has a somber air. Gone are the occupancy limit-smashing parties, the rock and roll nights, the weekend long dust ups when wealthy yacht club members greased the skids at the bar - all victims of Lou's ill temper. By now, everyone on the island and indeed anyone with a boat in the Gulf Islands has been the target of at least one of Lou's moments of unbridled disgust in/at humanity. She threw an entire yacht club out of the restaurant once after SHE bumped into a member who asked for some common courtesy. When Lou starts a sentence with: "I OWN this place" the locals know it's time to run. She is as much defined by that statement as she is cursed by it. She calmly confided in us that she thought it almost criminal that she "had" to buy over $10,000.00 worth of food every month to run this place. The fact that she's making a profit on this seems to escape her. "If only it would sell" she lamented to us over breakfast. We know she doesn't want that and deep down, she does too.
Pender Island, one big dysfunctional family. We love them all and we are grateful that Lou provides a funky marina and a beautiful grassy spot on small bluff above a beautiful beach where we could pitch our tent amidst great tall firs. At night, we'd watch the moon skate across the sky through the spectacle of a meteor shower and during the day we'd watch boat after boat skate into the marina below providing the spectacle of frantic skippers and first mates trying to catch a cleat as the wind pushed them through the dock, rock, dinghy obstacle course. In five days - only one woman overboard in the docking process. Not bad.