I've been thinking a lot about what I said and what I left unsaid and about the numerous supportive and friendly emails & p.m.s I've received in the interim.
First, Roger - C Hawk: it was wrong of me to throw cold -water on your sincere and heartfelt apology. I should have started a new thread to address the issues I wanted to. I've screwed up here before and typed faster than I should have, only to apologize later, and was glad it was accepted. I failed to meet your humility with graciousness. I'm sorry. We met at last year's SBSCBGT, you have a Fedora similar to the one I wear in inclement weather.
Secondly, Tyboo - you are right, my tone was out of line. On rereading it it sounds exactly like the pouty, emotional rant that it was.... an emotional extravagance for me at everyone else's expense, like an angry teenager storming off into the night. You all deserve better.
Thirdly, no one named me by name (or sent me any kind of negative email or pm. ) or referred to me in their comments to Greg/Dene. I saw them, still took it personally and like the straw that broke the camel's back, made a decision that I'd been pondering a long time.
Fourthly, I also believe this should be a site for C-Dory owners and those interested in finding out more about them. Were this to evolve into a general small-boating forum I can easily imagine discussions decaying into a series of various rants (e.g. deep V versus flat bottom; fiberglass vs. aluminum; Sea Ray vs. Bayliner; PWC vs. EVERYONE etc... this place would lose its backbone, its core, its large, friendly table where members sit and talk and share about all kinds of things, but primarily C-Dorys.
Fifthly, (how high can you count? I'm long winded), I'm still leaving, but I wanted to tell you why. I don't feel fully welcome. It is internal; it is within me. I've received nothing but generosity and kindness from most of the members here, and those little jibes about not having a C-Dory or having a beer can boat were far and few and not that big of a deal. I tease my friends about their boats all of the time and they me. It isn't that, rather, I've always felt that I was near the C-Dory table, but not seated at it, shouting in. That the large photo album, my style of writing and my willingness to jump in on any topic only served to make it all the more awkward. Here I was free to talk about most anything.... except my boat. I only felt comfortable sharing my frustration with its large, less than reliable, gas guzzling 460 V-8. I was comfortable researching the used 24 ' Tomcats that I still like (and was intrigued with the 22 Cruiser, 23 Venture and 25 Cruiser.... but honestly, I don't like their limited forward visibility & their seating arrangements aren't ideal for what I do mostly - fish off the back). Since I joined two years ago I've gone from frustration with my boat and searching to replacing it; to trying to sell my recreational property to help fund the "upgrade" to now today's troubled economy, a property not selling, a 460 engine that has been running great for over a year now (the new carb. really helped) my first son now off at Western Washington University (& realizing just how much money that will take) and a second son a junior in high school. My wife talks a good game of wanting to take up cruising....but I can't even get her to stay out all day in the boat we have, let alone go camp in it much. It would be a heck of a gamble to trade in what is working great for an expensive something she might not really want much to do with. For fishing, my boat is absolutely the RIGHT one for what we do, most of the time. I've decided to charter a boat one of these summers and see how she does for five days or so. Then re-visit the idea.
Sixthly, I still lust in my heart, for speed, for Tomcats and yes, even Sea Sports or that other C-Dory family member Skagit Orcas. So deep in my core, I'm untrue to the slow, pilothouse kind of boat so many of you love. Maybe once I'm retired, that will change.
So it is difficult for me to be here and not really be able to talk fully about my boating issues, concerns and yes, jet-boat joys.
It is going to be a long winter. I'm moving on for a while. I'm not storming off angry. Consider me on an extended hiatus. And maybe leave the porch light on for me.
Affectionately,
C.W.
